Then that would make the 2S the "base" model!! Shock horror!

 

Now if you REALLY want to read something funny about Porsche, how can you not laugh at this by Clarkson, written back in 2008....

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Clarkson on: Porsche
I don't want a Porsche Boxster. There are several reasons for this. First of all, while it is beautifully made and beautifully balanced, it is a bit cramped for fully grown men, the clutch is a bit of a faff and the styling's a bit backwards. Most of all though, I don't want a Porsche Boxster because James May has one. And there is, quite literally, nothing in his life that I covet. Not his postcode, not his old motorcycles, not his hoopy jumpers. Not even his swish new Vickers Velos aeroplane.

However, parked outside my house right now is a limited-edition Porsche Boxster called the RS60 Spyder. I've been using it for the last seven days, and I've decided I don't want one of these either.

Partly this is because it isn't a limited edition at all. It's just a normal Boxster S with a button that makes the exhaust a bit louder and an interior finished in what they call Carrera Red. Oh, and it has a 'unique' front spoiler designed primarily to make a hideous graunching noise on every single one of Oxford's 2.5 billion speed humps.

Of course, the RS 60 Spyder name is designed to stick its hand down the trousers of every Porsche enthusiast in the world and remind them with a warm squeeze of some long-forgotten racing car that Fortesque Major took to victory in the Mille Florio of 1903. But it doesn't. What this car does - what every Boxster does - is sit outside your house reminding you that you couldn't quite afford a 911.

I don't want a 911 either. And no, this has nothing to do with Richard Hammond. Yes, he does have a 911, and that's bad - I mean, look what it's done to his hair. But then he also has one of every other car in the world, so abandoning the 911 just because some fridge magnet in the Welsh borders has one wedged between his cross-eyed Morgan and his Vauxhall Firenza is silly.

“I don't want a Boxster because James has one. And there is, quite literally, nothing in his life that I covet”
I wish I did want a 911. I love the way they drive. I love the way they look. I love the way they are built. In my life, right now, a two-wheel-drive 911S would be absolutely perfect. So why did I buy the souped-up SLK55 Hitler-mobile instead?

Maybe you think I'm heading toward the Cayenne. Nope. Things I'd rather have include ebola, six elbows and an unquenchable desire to goose the Pope. It's brilliant. Tougher than you could imagine and properly fast. But it simply doesn't float my boat.

This is odd. We are all aware there is a chemistry between people. You meet someone, and before they've even drawn breath to speak, you know you hate every fibre of their being, and would like to hit them in the head with a shovel. Certainly, I felt this way when I first met Piers Morgan.

But how is it possible to have a chemical reaction to a ton-and-a-half of wiring, glass, steel and oil? Why do I now want a Mercedes SL65, which is a pointless car that has so much torque it will only accelerate downwards, through the centre of the Earth, and not a Porsche turbo, which is excellent?

I understand, of course, why some people deliberately buy awful cars.

Take the Citroen Picasso. This is a car for people who drive everywhere at 40. On the motorway. On the A44 when I'm in a rush. Through villages. In garden centres. Everywhere. Styled to be non-threatening, it manages, by trying not to be offensive to anyone, to be offensive to everyone. So why does anyone buy such a thing when there are so many alternatives? A wheelbarrow, for instance, or a holiday in Guantanamo Bay, or gout. I'll tell you why. Because the Citroen is cheap.

It's cheapness that causes people to buy a 4WD Kia. They need something to pull their caravan up a muddy field, and while they'd like a Range Rover, it's too expensive. That makes perfect sense to me. If I were a caravannist, with a family to feed and a modest income, I'd probably buy a Kia.

No, come to think of it, I wouldn’t. If I were a caravannist, with a family to feed and a modest income, what I’d actually do is kill myself.

What I’m bothered about though is what happens when you take value for money out of the equation. When you are making a purchasing decision in which dealer service, fuel economy, carbon dioxide and government tax bands are not an issue. In short: what I’m bothered about is why don’t I want a Porsche.

It’s not the badge. Speak this quietly, but I was the only person in the world who wanted a 924. I knew that it had an engine from a Volkswagen van and that it took six years to get from zero to 60mph and that it cost a million pounds and you were only paying for the badge. But it had pinstripe velour seats, and I liked that.

And then they fitted flared wheel arches and a new four-cylinder 2.5-litre engine to create the 944. I wanted one of those so much I ached. In fact, if I were to draw up a list of the 10 best cars I’ve ever driven, the 944 turbo would certainly be included. You can buy them these days for five grand.

By rights, I should hate the 928. It was the first press test car I ever crashed. And I used one to go and see my dad the day before he died. I also disliked the dreadful ride quality in later models. And yet, even today, when one grumbles by, my head does the full Linda Blair. It is, I think, one of the best-looking cars ever made.

So what’s happened? Why did I used to like Porsches and now I don’t?

Image? Well, yes, there was a time when a flat-nosed, guards red 911 with a whale tail spoiler was an automotive precursor to the imminent arrival of a ****. But since then, the ****s have been through the BMW phase and are now tailgating your **** with big, fast Audis. So what’s stopping me?

Happily, I think I have an answer. In the old days, Porsches were flawed and a bit flamboyant. The 944 had flared arches. The 924 had a van engine. The 928 had chequered flag seating. In brown. You got the impression they were designed by people who understood the whole business of cars. Not just how to make them go round corners.

Today though, I have the impression that Porsches are built by people who have an enormous collection of small screwdrivers. They really like choosing the exact composition of the tyres and the precise calibration of the fuel injectors. This is why the engine bay of a 911 looks like the back of a washing machine. It’s because it was developed by engineers, possibly the best in the business, and they don’t really care about aesthetics. They only want to build an equation, a formula, which will

go round the Nürburgring as quickly as possible.

So, when you buy a modern Porsche, you are demonstrating to the world that you are very interested in driving. And being ‘very interested in driving’ means that, for you, it is a hobby.

This is bad. Hobbies are for people who were caught masturbating as a child. They were told by their mothers that it’d drop off unless they got out of bed and did something useful. So they did. They built model planes and collected stamps. Some may have taken up ornithology. This will have made them very unpopular with their peers who could think of many more exciting things to do with bushes and birds. Show me someone in a 911, and I’ll show you someone who was bullied at school.

I have no statistics to hand, but I bet a great many golfists drive 911s. It’s because of what their mums told them. That they must have a way of filling their time that doesn’t include shuffling off to the loo with Asian Babes. They are not *******, then. And that, weirdly, is exactly the problem.

 

I find the talk of the Carrera as entry level to be a surprise - $85,000, plus tax, etc. for a car with no options at all seems a bit high for entry level into anything but home ownership. If you want to talk about whether the C2 or C2S (or the TT or TTS to get back to the theme) offer good value relative to each other or whether they are set at the correct price points, fine, good. But otherwise, I don't really see the point.


I continue to think - JMO - that a more relevant discussion is the Carrera in view of the Cayman S. They are clearly holding the HP of the Cayman back to maintain a gap for marketing. Of course there are differences and one could argue that the cars each stand on their own merits. But given the similar price, the small albeit artificial gap in HP, the trim levels at near equal prices, etc., it would be more reasonable to discuss whether Porsche can truly support both of these cars in their line up. I must be alone in this as I don't see much discussion.

 

No that would be poor produce placement.. They are great at sucking you into an upsell with a stairstep.. Entry level products serve to suck you in to a more expensive product..

For example, I started out thinking I wanted a 911, but said nah, I'll buy a Cayman.. then eventually convinced myself that the way I wanted it fully loaded wasn't that much cheaper than a base 911..

Then I decided I'd get a base 911, lightly loaded.. Then it got more fully loaded... Then by that time I said.. well the 911S is just a bit more now that I've loaded up my base 911. Then I was on a 911S.. (and $60K more than I originally intended on a cayman)..

But I suspect that starting out if I was already going to be at $120K of a 911S.. I would have talked myself out of spending the cash for a 911 in the first place..

Nope that base 911... serves an important entry and market distinction from the other models..

 

A bare bones 911 is in fact a great deal $85k IMHO. You'll have 99% of the 911 experience (whether you want it for its iconic look or the rear engine driving experience) at a 'competitive' price and more than enough power for most drivers.
Almost impossible to find it on a dealership lot though.

 

I see you have stumbled upon Porsche's secret locked away marketing plan.

 

Highly amusing article written by a very uninformed reviewer. Porsche builds what customers want, period. If the Turbo S was my only option up from the C4S in the 911 line, I would have even more strongly considered a 12C or 458, honestly. Oh, and btw, the lease residuals on the TT are 2-3% higher than the TTS, if that means anything. Oh, and tracking the TTS will be much more expensive given the CLs and the PCCBs.

 

Oh the problems and tough choices people have to deal with. I am not sure how most get through the day.

 

First world problems

 

Yes we are debating 100k + cars here while many wonder where their meal is coming from. Feeling blessed.

 

Won't the normal plan work: Oxycontin, Prozac and Single Malt. Oh, I am sorry, you are from the west coast. Let me translate: Merlot, wilted greens and shopping.

 

As a former west coaster, spot on AG991.

 

Come on, a 350 hp sports car for a base price of $85,000 is not a great deal. Its the exact opposite. You could get a 370Z NISMO for literally half of that and it would have the same performance. Lets be honest, a modern 911 is a lot of things, but a deal it certainly isn't.

 

Partly true, however, I could no more consider a 370 NISMO in my garage as I could a Mustang....another car with the right trim options that provides pretty impressive performance. Not slamming either car, just not an option for me.

 

My post is not aimed at identifying what car gives the most hp/$ or even performance/$. My point is that if you want to drive a 911 (because you love the looks and always dreamed to have one, because you think that the rear engine makes it different, because you like the balance of performance and comfort it offers, because of the fit and finish, etc.) THEN an $85k Carrera is an affordable way to realize your dream. I would bet that most 991's end up in the $120k+ range (going for an S and a few options; $140k if you splurge a bit). Like I said before, compared to this, $85k gives you most of the experience for 30% less $$.

A $85k car is already too expensive for 99% of the humanity so it is certainly not a great deal in general terms, but it makes it already easier for Porschephiles to buy the car they like.