How to win friends and influance people
#1
09-09-2004, 02:54 AM
How to win friends and influance people
So there I am.
Porsche driving experience.
Beautifully sunny day deep in the Midlands at the best test facility in the world.
Mira.
Sat by my side is none other than the legend.
Dickie Attwood, first man to win at Le Mans for Porsche in 1970 (though he should have won in 1969 and again in 1971)
Very pleasant day spent lapping the wet circuit building up a repore with the great man.
Dickie Attwood.
Onto the Dunlop handling circuit, with the great man by my side.
In my car.
And the sun is shinning.
Says to Dickie, first man to win at Le Mans for Porsche, "Don't tell me what I am doing right, tell me what I am doing wrong"
That's Richard Attwood. In my car. Beautiful sunny day.
Off we go for our first couple of laps.
Richard starts to retell the story of travelling down the Mulsanne Straight at 247mph with the front wheels 1/2" off the ground.
Me "Any comments Richard?"
Richard " No, you are doing everything just right"
That's Richard Attwood, first man to win Le Mans for Porsche.
1970. Should have won in 1969 and 1971 as well. I am doing everything right.
It IS a Beautiful day.
Me " Richard, what would you do different?"
Richard " Nothing much, but you might want to try a different braking method. I will tell you when to brake so that you can carry a bit more speed through the corner"
Did I mention that it was Richard Attwood in my car?
Past the control tower flat in third. Change up into 4th pulling about 120mph coming into the narrow left hander. 500yrds to go
Me thinking " This must seem very slow to a man that has travelled down the Mulsanne Straight. At 247mph.
With the front wheel 1/2" off the ground.
Wonder when he is going to tell me to brake?"
125mph. Corner now 300yrds.
With Richard Attwood. In my car. Wonderful day.
Me thinking" These racing driver boys must have nerves of steel to be at the 300yrd board and not even begin to think of braking"
127mph. Getting a bit nervous as corner now 250yrds.
But it is Richard Attwood giving instruction. 1970. Won Le Mans you know.
130mph. corner now 200yrds.
Getting to the famous "half crown, thruppenny bit" stage.
Richard Attwood. Racing at Goodwood this weekend. In my car. He will tell me when to brake.
132mph.
Not yet.
150yrds
No movement from Richard Attwood, Porsche Legend
100yrds.
**** this, I don't care if you are M. Cobblerboy 7 times world champion I am braking.
Once safely(!!!!!!) around the 61mph off camber 180 degree bend Richard turns to me and asks.
" Do you always brake like that?"
" I was waiting for you to tell me when to brake"
"Oh. I meant the next corner where there is some run off....."
I could just imagine the Headlines....
No wonder he was reluctant to shake my hand at the end of the day.
Suppose there are better ways of making an impression on someone!
Good job I had the new willow patterns on.
P.
Porsche driving experience.
Beautifully sunny day deep in the Midlands at the best test facility in the world.
Mira.
Sat by my side is none other than the legend.
Dickie Attwood, first man to win at Le Mans for Porsche in 1970 (though he should have won in 1969 and again in 1971)
Very pleasant day spent lapping the wet circuit building up a repore with the great man.
Dickie Attwood.
Onto the Dunlop handling circuit, with the great man by my side.
In my car.
And the sun is shinning.
Says to Dickie, first man to win at Le Mans for Porsche, "Don't tell me what I am doing right, tell me what I am doing wrong"
That's Richard Attwood. In my car. Beautiful sunny day.
Off we go for our first couple of laps.
Richard starts to retell the story of travelling down the Mulsanne Straight at 247mph with the front wheels 1/2" off the ground.
Me "Any comments Richard?"
Richard " No, you are doing everything just right"
That's Richard Attwood, first man to win Le Mans for Porsche.
1970. Should have won in 1969 and 1971 as well. I am doing everything right.
It IS a Beautiful day.
Me " Richard, what would you do different?"
Richard " Nothing much, but you might want to try a different braking method. I will tell you when to brake so that you can carry a bit more speed through the corner"
Did I mention that it was Richard Attwood in my car?
Past the control tower flat in third. Change up into 4th pulling about 120mph coming into the narrow left hander. 500yrds to go
Me thinking " This must seem very slow to a man that has travelled down the Mulsanne Straight. At 247mph.
With the front wheel 1/2" off the ground.
Wonder when he is going to tell me to brake?"
125mph. Corner now 300yrds.
With Richard Attwood. In my car. Wonderful day.
Me thinking" These racing driver boys must have nerves of steel to be at the 300yrd board and not even begin to think of braking"
127mph. Getting a bit nervous as corner now 250yrds.
But it is Richard Attwood giving instruction. 1970. Won Le Mans you know.
130mph. corner now 200yrds.
Getting to the famous "half crown, thruppenny bit" stage.
Richard Attwood. Racing at Goodwood this weekend. In my car. He will tell me when to brake.
132mph.
Not yet.
150yrds
No movement from Richard Attwood, Porsche Legend
100yrds.
**** this, I don't care if you are M. Cobblerboy 7 times world champion I am braking.
Once safely(!!!!!!) around the 61mph off camber 180 degree bend Richard turns to me and asks.
" Do you always brake like that?"
" I was waiting for you to tell me when to brake"
"Oh. I meant the next corner where there is some run off....."
I could just imagine the Headlines....
No wonder he was reluctant to shake my hand at the end of the day.
Suppose there are better ways of making an impression on someone!
Good job I had the new willow patterns on.
P.
#6
09-09-2004, 05:41 AM
Re: How to win friends and influance people
" Do you always brake like that?"
" I was waiting for you to tell me when to brake"
"Oh. I meant the next corner where there is some run off....."
I could just imagine the Headlines....
No wonder he was reluctant to shake my hand at the end of the day.
Suppose there are better ways of making an impression on someone!
Good job I had the new willow patterns on.
P. [/B][/QUOTE]
Funniest thing I've read in a long time!!!
" I was waiting for you to tell me when to brake"
"Oh. I meant the next corner where there is some run off....."
I could just imagine the Headlines....
No wonder he was reluctant to shake my hand at the end of the day.
Suppose there are better ways of making an impression on someone!
Good job I had the new willow patterns on.
P. [/B][/QUOTE]
Funniest thing I've read in a long time!!!
#7
09-09-2004, 06:05 AM
Inside Dickie Attwood's helmet
-----------------------------------------------------
Lovely day.
Sunny.
Bloody Midlands, but what can you do. It's a nice track.
Helping the kids around the track. Bit of a step down for me.
I won bloody Le Mands, and was robbed blind.
Not once but twice.
This chap's wanting to brake late, it seems.
300 yds to go, better start to brake soon, sonshine.
250 yds. Likes to brake late. Trying to impress me.
I won Le mans, y'know.
200 yds - I'm not easily impressed.
150 yds - I'm easily scared, though
101 yds - come to think of it, I'm so chuffin' scared right now, I can't even open my mouth to scream.
100 yds - Oh, now he brakes. We're going to die. I can imagine the headlines "Legendary Le Mans winner dies in fiery crash. Porsche GT3RS destroyed. Driver lives and marries supermodel."
4 seconds later....
Says " Do you always brake like that?"
Thinks "And you've lived this long"
" I was waiting for you to tell me when to brake"
Thinks "What!! We almost bloody died because you were waiting for a wet-nurse"
Says "Oh. I meant the next corner where there is some run off....."
Thinks "Why can't I be more like Derek Bell?"
-----------------------------------------------------
Lovely day.
Sunny.
Bloody Midlands, but what can you do. It's a nice track.
Helping the kids around the track. Bit of a step down for me.
I won bloody Le Mands, and was robbed blind.
Not once but twice.
This chap's wanting to brake late, it seems.
300 yds to go, better start to brake soon, sonshine.
250 yds. Likes to brake late. Trying to impress me.
I won Le mans, y'know.
200 yds - I'm not easily impressed.
150 yds - I'm easily scared, though
101 yds - come to think of it, I'm so chuffin' scared right now, I can't even open my mouth to scream.
100 yds - Oh, now he brakes. We're going to die. I can imagine the headlines "Legendary Le Mans winner dies in fiery crash. Porsche GT3RS destroyed. Driver lives and marries supermodel."
4 seconds later....
Says " Do you always brake like that?"
Thinks "And you've lived this long"
" I was waiting for you to tell me when to brake"
Thinks "What!! We almost bloody died because you were waiting for a wet-nurse"
Says "Oh. I meant the next corner where there is some run off....."
Thinks "Why can't I be more like Derek Bell?"
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#15
09-09-2004, 08:14 AM
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